Run + Lunges

This evening was the PERFECT running weather. I had to take advantage of the beautiful day and commemorate it with a nice run. My run took place smack dab in the middle of the Silicon Valley. It's a nature preserve / golf park. I really couldn't have picked a better spot. There were enough people to make it pleasant and not overly crowded. The breeze was gentle and the air was perfect. I didn't even listen to any music because nature alone just sounded like music to my ears.

I did a 35 minute run with stops for photo ops and mini breathers. I took my time tonight, and really just appreciated all the God put in front of me. Nature at her finest. Later, I did my 100 lunges in the parking lot. I tried to go as low and parallel to the ground as possible. There were other runners milling around in groups. I felt a little lonely, but really appreciative for the time to just let my brain unwind without any unnecessary chatter. It was lovely. Below are some pics that don't quite capture how pretty the evening really was.

(lagoon)

(path to lagoon)

(bridge on the path)

My conditioning wasn't as good as I'd hoped it would be. My guess it's because of the actual time during my cycle. I've been tired and a little moody all week. Definitely sore, but still hanging in there! I hope I get the chance to really enjoy another evening run like tonight sometime soon.

Read More!

Eats

So today...I've done really well with the diet. I've been crossing off my P's, C's, F's, G's and no T's :)
The goal for today - and moving forward is: (at least until I get to the buffing stage)

(daily)
5 proteins
4 carbs
3 fats
2 greens - or more
1 treat - if needed

Here's how I've done today - so far..

M1: 2P, 2C - egg and ham sandwich from Starbucks - no cheese (can't eat dairy) decaf soy latte. I'm not 100% positive, but I think soy milk counts as a protein and a carb...

M2: P, C, G, F - very large arugula salad w/ strawberry slices, cucumbers, prociutto (slices) and almond vinegarette. 2 Mixed seeds crackers.

M3: P, C - eggwhite protein shake, and 1/2 peach

M4: P, G, F - (I haven't eaten this yet, but am planning on it) Lemon Pepper chicken, sauteed garlic spinach - sauteed with olive oil. 1 tsp. organic pb. (dessert) :)

Water intake so far: 6 glasses, which I will definitely put a dent in while doing my cardio tonight. I'm also taking a prenatal (in prep of getting preggers) so I don't worry too much about any extra vitamins, as I'm getting plenty of calcium, etc. I should start taking my fish oil pills, I just have such a hard time digesting them after a meal...

I think tomorrow, I will plan this out better so I can spread it out over 5 meals instead of 4.

This is a lot easier than I realized. I guess by default you do kinda have to plan it out just to make sure everything's in check.

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Here's the plan for tomorrow (while I still have time to think about this)

M1: P, C, F - 2 scrambled eggs - made w/ olive oil, and strawberries

M2: P, C, G, F - canned tuna fish mixed w/ LF mayo on a bed of lettuce, and sliced almonds. 1 plain rice cake.

M3: P, C - turkey jerky, and 1/2 banana

M4: P, C, G, F - sloppy joe's made with lean ground beef, on a slice of brown rice bread, mixed green salad w/ dressing

M5: P, F - Eggwhite shake and 1 tsp. organic pb.

It's hard for me to get the fat I need because I can only eat so many nuts / pb. I don't eat dairy so that's been a challenge. The carb consumption isn't hard at all as I LOVE fruit and rice, and stuff like that.

Actually, this is good because I have to go to the groccery store tonight, so this sort of forces me to do one big trip instead of many small ones. This way I have dinner for tomorrow night planned out too. YAY! Maybe we can rent something and just chill out...it's been a long week..I'll need to squeeze in a weight traning session in there somewhere... Read More!

Wednesday's Workout + Lunges...and then some

Last night was the ABSOLUTE BOMB workout. I dont' think I've ever pushed myself quite so hard. Upping my sets to 4 was a phenomenal idea. I can see where I need work though. But this is good, it's really starting to show my weaknesses. So I plan to improve in those areas. With time, I will rock, I just need more time..And more focus on my diet. The 5-4-3-2-1 diet by Buffmother really inspired me. Now I just need to put it into play. Here's last night's breakdown.

10 min. bike warmup

Leg Press
90lbs x 8
100lbs x 8
120lbs x 8
140lbs x 8 -this is the first time I've broken the 100 mark!! I think I was ready cause I went far past it!

Overhead Tricep Ext.
22.5lbs x 8
25lbs x 8
30lbs x 8
35lbs x 8 - I thought I was going to drop the dumbbell on my head, it was so heavy. But I cranked out 8 reps..

Lat. Pulldown
70lbs x 8
80lbs x 8
80lbs x 8 -I seem to be stuck at this weight right now...
70lbs x 8 - I felt too shaky at 80 so I dropped it down to 70 again

Calf Raise
40lbs x 8
50lbs x 8
60lbs x 8
70lbs x 8

Lateral Shoulder Raise
12.5lbs x 8
15lbs x 8
15lbs x 8
15lbs x 8 - This was harder than I thought it was going to be at this weight.

Dumbbell Curls
15lbs x 8
15lbs x 8
17.5lbs x 8
20lbs x 8 -I think if I am going to go heavier on these, I need to do them more frequently than once per week

Lunges
(Stationary and walking)
15lbs x 25 -per leg
(Reverse)
15lbs x 25 -per leg

Abs (the machine where you lay down on - forget what it's called) total = 5 sets of 50
crunches
100
Obliques
50 -per side
crunches with knees pulled in
50

Leg Extensions
90lbs x 8
100lbs x 8
110lbs x 8
130lbs x 8

Leg Curls
40lbs x 8
45lbs x 8
50lbs x 8
55lbs x 8 - It's been a long time since I've been able to go this heavy.

So there you have it. Not sure where all this strength came from last night. I'm in my boosting phase, so naturally you'd think I'd be a little out of it? I had SO much energy after I got home, I found it difficult to go to sleep until about 12. I did go home, have a healthy dinner and then just passed out on the couch w/ hubby. I can definitely feel it today. I think I can do 200 lunges, and be okay with it. I think I will try it tonight after my cardio. Here's to a new day of clean eating and great fitness accomplishments! Read More!

Tuesday's Workout + Lunges

Last night's workout was more fun than normal. I got to do cardio with my cousin!!! I don't normally workout with anyone, so this was really nice. I didn't realize how fast the time flies when you're gabbing away. I was still tired and sore from Monday night's 200 lunge mania. Here's what I did.

Abs: (3 sets of 25)
crunches
obliques
leg lifts

Treadmill: 30 min. run

Lunges:
walking lunge
10lbs x 50 (per leg)
(during that time I also added in a reverse lunge and an angeled stationary lunge)

Tonight is weight training. I've been thinking about this, and I think I'm ready to bring it up to 4 sets. (heavy sets). My eats were good today all the way up until the afternoon, when I completely messed it up by eating a danish. I've been eating carbs today because I've been feeling a little "empty" not sure why. So I allowed myself this cheat day. Tomorrow, it's back to business. Clearly I can't take a cheat day right now without going overboard.

Although, I HAVE managed to avoid the stupid candy dish that I pass about ten thousand times / day. :) YAY for one little victory! Read More!

Monday's workout + LUNGES!!

I was so amped to take on the lunge challenge last night, that it didn't dawn on me that I actually did DOUBLE the requirement (did 200 instead of 100) until I was well on my way home, driving down the road...Seriously, am I really THAT bad at math!? I'm an artist and all, but c'mon now...So here's yesterdays breakdown. By the way, I actually had to make other arrangements for dinner, because I knew that once my butt hit the couch, it would not get up again. No use in risking it, I've had a great track record these past few weeks, and I wasn't about to put a dent in it! The solution: Just KEEP DRIVING STRAIGHT TO THE GYM! I'm so glad I did, because I was totally NOT in the mood to workout last night.

warm up 10 min. elliptical (no numb toes or cramping - HOORAY!)

Bench Press (machine)
110lbs x 8
120lbs x 8
130lbs x 8

Squats (w/ dumbbells)
15lbs x 10
17.5lbs x 10
20lbs x 10

Bent Over Row (with barbell)
30lbs x 8
35lbs x 8
40lbs x 8 - hard!

Shoulder Press
15lbs x 8
17.5lbs x 8
20lbs x 8

Deadlift (with barbell)
40lbs x 8
50lbx x 8
60lbs x 8 - was getting a little heavy

Lunges (each leg)
15lbs x 25
0 x 25
0 x 25
10lbs x 25

Abs
Crunches
3 sets of 25

Obliques
3 sets of 25

Leg Lifts
3 sets of 25

Overall it was a great workout. I could've squatted heavier, but I wanted to go easy since this was the first time I'd attempted to do so many lunges at once. Really, the soreness is UNREAL today. But I will prevail. I will do another 100 tonight!! (after my run) Read More!

Great Run on Sat. / Yoga on Sun.

I wasn't planning on doing anything else past Friday, but I guess with all this movement, I haven't really been able to stop! So, the family and I packed up the car (along with another little buddy for my step-son) and headed to Santa Cruz. I had a FANTASTIC run along the coast! I didn't realize that I actually cranked out about 4.5 miles. I started the run listening to my itrain marathon training mp3, then realized after 20 min. that I wasn't ready for that yet. Although the sprints were really good for me...I need to start doing those again. After that, I switched to my own music for about 15 min. Then, I just wanted to hear the ocean waves crashing. So for the rest of my run, I just listened to the surf. It was divine. What wasn't so divine was dodging so many people. Apparently I wasn't the only one who thought a little jaunt along the coast was a magnificent idea. Below are some pictures I took a little while after my run.

(total run time 49 min) - I did a slow 11 min / mile run.

(above photo W. Cliff Dr. looking north)

(above photo W. Cliff Dr. looking west)

Sunday, I decided that I was too stiff and took a Yoga class for the first time in a very long time. It felt really good to give my body the stretching it deserved. Sunday also happened to be the day that I feel off the no-carb wagon and indulged. I'm okay with it though, I've worked really hard last week. This week, I'll be more disciplined.

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Friday's always a kicker -Workout Detailed

So, it's the end of the week. I'm pooped. Now, that is (after my workout) This new workout circuit that I'm doing is fewer reps. I'm so used to doing high reps, that I'm stuck scratching my head..thinking...."well, I can't lift that little amount of weight, if I'm only doing 6 reps." So in a way, its kind of genius, because it really forces me to focus on my form, and to go heavier. A lot heavier. I think it's going to push me up to that next level of lifting. That's my wish..

The eating...okay, this has been out of control this week. This "no bread" rule has spun off into something totally mind boggling to me. I've transitioned my ridiculous love affair with all things carb-related to sugar related. I mean really...This has to stop..I think I'm starting to see my problem...I am going to start breaking up my meals. I eat three pretty large meals regularly. In fact too regularly. I think I'm eating too much..I've eaten smaller meals in the past and have proven to myself that it is possible to lose weight with diet modifications alone...But that's not going to be my approach. I think what I'll start doing is breaking up each of my three meals in half. Although there is something comforting and warming about having a nice full belly. The way I look at it is....If there are movie stars, singers, and famous people that can do this..Well, so can I. Dorky, I know. But they're doing something right..At least some of them. (not of the drug-taking kind)

Here's what I did tonight. I hit the weights harder than normal because again, it was that whole mental "only 6 reps" thing going through my mind..

10 min. elliptical warm up. (that weird cramping thing happened again, this time at the end of my warmup..not sure why this keeps happening)

Deadlifts (with barbell)

35lbs x 6 (warm up set)

40lbs x 6

50lbs x 6

60lbs x 6

Incline Dumbbell Press

20lbs x 8

22.5lbs x 8

25lbs x 8 - I thought I was going to drop the dumbbells at this point. But this little guy next to me kept grabbing heavier weights..Competitive, I know...its my ego lifting acting up. I WASN'T going to be shown up by some little man...

Barbell Row

20lbs x 8 (warm up set)

25lbs x 8

30lbs x 8

35lbs x 8 - these bad boys kicked my butt, they're a lot harder than they look!

Smith Press Machine Squats

50lbs x 6

70lbs x 6

80lbs x 6

0 x 10 - ghost squats (no weight squats all the way to the ground) I don't know why, but this last ghost set feels really good at the end of squatting kinda heavy..

Dumbbell Shrugs

15lbs x 10

17.5lbs x 10

20lbs x 10 - I felt ridiculous doing these, they look really dumb...

Hip Abduction Machine (inner thighs)

90lbs x 8

110lbs x 8

130lbs x 8

Abs - Crunches (with medicine ball)

4lbs x 25

6lbs x 25

8lbs x 25

Abs - Obliques

4lbs x 20

6lbs x 20

8lbs x 20

Leg lifts (on chair thingy)

0 x 25

0 x 25

0 x 25

By the last set of abs, I was ready to keel over and die. It was a great workout. After recovering for a bit, I even mozied on down to the cardio room. Call me crazy, but I considered taking a class after all this...Which leads me to believe, that 1. I'm either totally insane, or 2. I might not be going heavy enough....

Ok..Time to map out tomorrow's trail run. I've downloaded the latest Grace Lazenby (sp?) ipod workout for Livestrong. I hope I can make it through a 45 min. run, it's been a while since I've run for that long.

Read More!

Oh yeah...one more thing....

Not sure if anyone else has ever experienced this...but my toes went numb tonight during my workout...First the left, then the right. I'm here thinkin. Maybe I just drank too much and the infinite amount of water pressing down on my bladder might be affecting the nerves in my spine? Okay. So I'm no med student, but I still can't figure out what the hell might cause my toes to go numb?! Too much arch support...Is there such thing? Don't know. Any answers welcome!

(Below are the shoes I've been wearing)

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Strange Cardio Night

Tonight was a strange cardio night at the gym. I expected more out of it than I actually got. I guess I'm just horribly out of touch with my cardiovascular abilities these days. I did this:

20 min. on the stair stepper - which I bounced around between level 13 and level 8. Eventually dropping it down to 8 because I was cramping.

20 min. on Elliptical (cross trainer) - I don't normally count this as my cardio, I usually just do warmups on this machine. I prefer to run, but it was really warm out this evening so I decided to keep the workout indoors. And honestly, after my cramping incident on the stair stepper, I decided to take things down a notch.

Also, today was monumental in the sense that I *almost* drank a full gallon of water! Now this may sound elementary to most of you, but to me it was a big thing. I have about a 1/4 left to drink. I'm not sure if it's safe to finish off this gallon at 10:35pm. I really don't want to be up all night. *Note to self...do not drink almost a full gallon and attempt to attend "back to school night!" I had my poor hubby looking at me like I was neurotic after every bell, I was looking for the loo. Ya..best to practice this water chugging thing in the comforts of my own home thank-you-very-much.

Tomorrow, I will tackle the following:

• I will make breakfast at home (as I've been doing everyday this week so far!)
• I will opt for salad during lunch/ or stir fry sans the rice
• I will AVOID the candy dish at work...(this sounds dumb, but Halloween time is my demise, and I have to draw on every disciplinary reserve I have to avoid eating candy)
• I will not have change with me, so the vending machine is out of the question.
• I will have another great strength-training workout. (third this week)
• I will have a plan of attack for Saturday's cardio bonanza.
• I will be HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY, because it's finally FRIDAY!!!!

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I ♥ Weight Traning / Wednesday's Workout

In lieu of SSS I had to revamp my workout. I have this newbie workout that's a bit on the beginner's side of the spectrum, but I had to get back to the basics. I need to shine in all my weight training badness. In actuality I really needed to scale it back a bit. I was doing full body workouts three times a week and was starting to burn myself out a bit. This new workout schedule I think will be better suited to my schedule, while giving me the best possible workout during the hour to hour and a half I have to spare. I may make modifications to it over the course of the next week or two, but at least it's a good starting off point...So, pull up a chair..Here we go..

Leg Press
70lbs x 8
90lbs x 8
110lbs x 8

Overhead Tricep Ext (dumbbells)
20lbs x 8
22.5lbs x 8
30lbs x 8

Lat. pull downs
70lbs x 8
80lbs x 8
80lbs x 8 - this last set was HARD.

Calf Raises
30lbs x 8
40lbs x 8
50lbs x 8

Shoulder Raises
18lbs x 8
17.5lbs x 8
20lbs x 8

Dumbbell Curls
12.5lbs x 10
15lbs x 10 (I LOVE that the 15lbs feels light now!)
17.5lbs x 10

Leg Ext.
90lbs x 8
110lbs x 8
130lbs x 8 (call me crazy, but I think I am starting to see something here)

Lying Leg Curls
40lbs x 8
45lbs x 8
50lbs x 8

Abs
(crunches on incline bench)
3 sets of 25 reps

(Obliques)
3 sets of 20 reps

(leg lifts on decline bench)
3 sets of 25 reps

There you have it! I am going to do some cardio today. The eating has been insane. I can't figure out if it's stress, the increased workouts, or pregnancy? It could very well be none of the above, and I just need to get a grip on my eating...I'll save that post for another day. I'll update the blog tonight with my cardio workout. Oh yeah, I want to add, that last night, when I did all these exercises, I was totally not in the mood to workout. And I'm so glad that I did!!! Read More!

Weight Training and Pregnancy??

So, in preperation to conceive (we're hoping to sometime soon) I've stumbled on the age old adage regarding working out and the inability to conceive. My family swears by it. I'm not sure what to believe. I've heard of marathon runners that conceived while prepping for their big run. So why should I be so concerned about this? My husband and I have been trying for 9 months with very little luck. I'm just going to continue my workouts and maybe scale back on the runs a bit. It just saddens me that I am still so confused about this kind of stuff...I know you have to have an optimal amount of bodyfat to conceieve (which I do!) but am I making myself barren?

I need to look into this further....

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Update: To any pregnant mommies out there, I've just stumbled onto a page that was super helpful. check it out...http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/pregnancy.htm

also...

http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/simone3.htm

lastly...I picked up this bad boy yesterday. I was so excited to get it at the very good price of "FREE" that I felt like running around the neighborhood with my dog in it. Ok..probably not a good idea since he's a full size Boxer :)







Read More!

Weight Training

Last night, I had a really good workout. I'm trying to narrow down what sort of circuit or strength training program I want to stick to. I didn't do a full three days this week, since I'm traveling. Its been a little challenging balancing the work / life stuff. The diet hasn't quite fallen into place like I'd hoped. Next week, I'll be back on track. Although this week has been an enlightening departure from my normal way of eating. I need to get back to my normal ways. With SSS kicking into gear, and the "no bread rule" this week. I'm looking forward to the challenge!

But here's what I did last night.

Warm up: Elliptical for 10 min.
(3 sets of total -> weight x reps)

Squats (on smith press machine)
20lbs x 15
40lbs x 15
50lbs x 12

Chest Press (on machine)
45lbs x 15
55lbs x 15
65lbs x 15

Inner Thigh Press (machine) - not sure if this is the correct name
70lbs x 15
90lbs x 15
110lbs x 15

Triceps (on machine)
60lbs x 15
70lbs x 15
80lbs x 15

Leg Extensions
72lbs x 15
82lbs x 12
92lbs x 10

Dumbbell Shoulder Raise (lateral)
7.5lbs x 15
10lbs x 12
12.5lbs x 10

Dumbbell Shoulder Raise (front)
7.5lbs x 15
10lbs x 12
12.5lbs x 10

Bicep Curls
7.5lbs x 15
10lbs x 15
12.5lbs x 15

Tricep Dips (on bench)
body weight only x 15
body weight only x 15
body weight only x 15

Chin Ups (on Gravitron machine - weight was constant 90lbs. very hard still)
90lbs x 10
90lbs x 10
90lbs x 10

Exercise Ball Crunch
body weight only x 25
body weight only x 25
body weight only x 25

Exercise Ball Crunches Obliques
body weight only x 20
body weight only x 20
body weight only x 20

Hanging Leg Raises
body weight only x 25
body weight only x 25
body weight only x 25 Read More!

vacation = rest?

This week, I'm in fabulous CO. Just outside of Boulder. I have been here for two days. The first day, I found my way to a gym, and successfully pressed through a tough workout. My body was tired from a long weekend and very little sleep. Since then, I've managed to sleep 8-10 hours per night! I can't remember the last time I slept so much! I'm visiting a very dear friend who's husband is out of town. She and her daughter are the sweetest. The baby is 5 months old, and so adorable. It just reinforces my desire to be a mother. But this is giving me the first hand look at how demanding that role can actually be. I can see that I am in transition. I'm wanting to be a mother, and yet, I want to bust out with my most rockin' body ever..Still..Not that that's a bad thing. I'm just preoccupied with myself these days.

I'm working remotely, so the duties of work still beckon. Gladly, they're minimal this week. Lots of quiet time. Thank God!

I haven't been doing any hardcore cardio or anything, just leisurely walks in the morning. Hour walks actually. It's nice. Tonight I will strength train. I think I need to modify my workout. My back feels a little overworked. I've been focusing a lot on my legs / lower body and lower back. I need to look around and figure out if I'm on the right track. I may update this once I find something that looks appealing.

Over and out. Read More!

Why is it so hard to workout on Fridays?

It's Friday. It's 4:02pm...I'm sitting at my desk looking at my keys longingly. Home...the thought of it makes my heart sing. Home for a few days before I HAVE to turn this computer back on for an indefinite amount of time. Who am I kidding, I'll find something I have to work on tomorrow, I'm sure..See, I just did it..I forgot to send something to a client...It doesn't look like I'm going anywhere anytime soon.

Then again...that's why I'm here. I'm trying to amp myself up to go to the gym. Ordinarily, I love working out, but on Fridays, I just seem to struggle. Next week, I'll be in Boulder. Thankfully, I've located a gym near where I'll be working! I'm so excited to check out a new place. Sometimes it's nice to switch things up a little.

I think I've just figured out why I run out of juice by the end of the week. I'm just tired...what a concept. It's like I don't give myself the permission to conk out when needed. I remember when I studied abroad, daytime naps were a must. Of course that was in Italy, everyone did that!

Okay..Here I go..I'm attempting to get out of Dodge early! Wish me luck. Read More!

SSS = Super Star Success

After much change in these past few months, I've learned a bit about myself.

1. I have a dairy allergy = migraines / headaches
2. I seem to have a gluten intolerance, but eat it in moderation = digestive issues
3. Its been easier than I expected to make these changes!
4. I forgot how much I love to workout!
5. I've gotten sucked up in the "sugar vacuum." And desperately need to find my way out. :\

So, I try to go easy on the gluten, zero dairy, and I'm trying to cut soy out of my diet too. I've been reading that it interferes with your endocrine system when trying to conceive, and we all know that's been a 9 month uphill battle! All this to cleanse the temple. My weight is still way higher than I'm comfortable with, but its safe to say that I'm making strides towards change. I decided to embark on a 40 session weight training bonanza. This also includes 26 cardio sessions. It all happen to fall inline with the buffmother.com SSS contest, so more positive reinforcement, what more could I ask for!? This is basically a 10 week contest to try and get into the best shape ever - prizes for winners permitting. It will be a push, but I'm pretty confident about it. I still need to take some "before" photos, which I don't love, because they sort of depress me. But I know later, I will be glad that I did.

Here are 3 things, that I've been asked to journal about...

1- When were you at your peak physical condition?
Do you remember how great you felt both mentally and physically?

Answer:
My peak physical condition occurred about 6 years ago. When I was about 26. I was about 30lbs lighter than what I weigh now, and my muscle tone was definitely visible. I was more thin than muscular, but I felt so great. It was the first time in my life that I was ever able to fit into a size 1 in jeans. I was a svelt 110 - 114 lbs. I miss those days. Mentally...it was something of a battle, I had family members (I'm from an Italian family) hollering about how I'd gotten too thin. I had friends, worried that I had some sort of eating disorder. But actually I was in the best shape of my life! I could've eaten better, I pretty much ate very little, because of my living circumstances..But emotionally / mentally, I was sort of cornered into thinking that something was wrong with me. It was my husband (then boyfriend) that was my cheerleader. It was with his help that I devised a workout / diet plan. I weight trained religiously about three days a week. I did cardio 2-3 times / week. That was when I discovered my love for running. I've fallen off the boat, and I think now, I can see why.


2- What do you have to change about your current habits to attain results like that again?

Answer:
First and foremost, I need to change how I deal with stress. I also need to stop relying on sugar and crappy food for quick fixes and emotional outlets. I've devised a weight training / cardio plan that I've already started implementing. It's nice to be over the hump of extreme soreness (after not having worked out for so long - with such intensity) I still get sore, but its a good sore. Now I'm actually looking forward to my visits to the gym. I love running, so the trail is always beckoning to me. :)

I seem to take out my stress on myself, and its really starting to show. I've had to stash away all my small clothes, buy bigger clothes, get off the pill and try to plan a pregnancy...which we all know is just a disaster waiting to happen, - given my current state of mind, unless I get into better shape soon. (Coincidentally, the pill I was on had a diuretic in it, similar to caffeine, which I've also given up) So I think I'm carrying around a bit more water weight than normal. Perhaps, I should start focusing on bringing small snacks, and comfortable shoes to take a walk when things get too hectic around here. I could sit on an stability ball, and take quick mini-breaks. Also, I need to get rid of all my change so I don't raid the break room vending machine, when I have a chocolate fit. (I don't eat artificial sweetners either) so the only sugar I plan to have is the natural kind that is already in fruit. I will need to blog more, to find an actual vent for my frustrations... And of course start journaling my workouts / diet.

I think the turning point for me was just this week, when I sat down and looked at my quads. Which, I've hated doing these past few years, because I haven't been able to see past the cellulite. But just this week, I felt a little bump in my quad, just above my knee. It wasn't huge, but it was my muscle just starting to peek through. (I've been weight training for a few weeks, so I'm cheating a little on the SSS.)This tiny little bump made me soar! I couldn't believe I could actually "feel" the fruits of my labor! After all these lunges, squats, leg extensions, "something" was showing!

3- What is your #1 goal for the next 10 weeks? What are the "solutions" you must
stay focused upon in order to attain that goal?

Answer:
My goal for the next 10 weeks is going to be consistency, and discipline. To not only commit to my plan, but be accountable for all my actions. I am going to dig deeper than I ever have to find that fine balance between discipline and restraint. I will still continue trying to conceive, but will put less emphasis on it. (I need to take the mania out of baby-making). My solution will be to come to work equipped with healthy food and snacks, and have my fitness gear (shoes, etc) already packed in my trunk for after work sessions. (This I already do - religiously!) And try to stay in the right frame of mind. Rome wasn't built in a day, so I can't expect perfection in just a few short weeks. I should expect progress, and a good foundational platform.

My plan B, for (if) we get preggers, will be to continue on with the healthy eating / workouts. I want to try and workout throughout my pregnancy for as long as I can, of course within reason. So until I physically CAN'T do the workouts anymore, I will keep pushing for as long and hard as I can.

That's the plan, and I'm stickin to it! Read More!

An Emotional Weekend

So this weekend, again, was quite disasterous with regards to eating. However though, I am learning to bounce back and change my frame of thought. This time it took me a day and a half of positive self-talk and a bit of coaxing to come down from that ledge of emotional eating. Here are a few things that happened that led me to this.....

Friday - The Graduation Ceremony: step son's 8th grade graduation...This was stressful and emotional because our little man is growing up. It's been a little hard to come to terms with this because this means that my husband and I are *cringe* "getting older...." The arrival of my mother-in-law and my mom as well was comforting. They came with us and had a sort of calming effect on me. Also, this event was stressful because it was the possible avenue to a potentially disasterous encounter with the ex-wife. Which thankfully never happened...Later that night, we went out to Mexican food, which of course you need with a drink. Thankfully the drink was the only mistake I made that night. (Of course, I forgot I wasn't supposed to be drinking because I might be preggers....)

Saturday - The Graduation Party: Was very nice actually. The only stressful part was not giving ourselves enough time to get stuff done. But in the end most of the arrivals were late and pretty much everything was finished! My eating got out of hand because I didn't eat enough throughout the day which led to overeating later in the day and into that night. I just caved and decided to call that whole night a wash. Bad choice on my part because it made things all the much harder the next day.

Sunday - Finally a chance to relax: of course the worst felons of temptation were still lying around the house. (Chocolate chip cookies, cheese cake, chips) all of which found their way onto my plate and into my mouth shortly before 1pm...After feeling totally gluttonous and emotionally drained from my self-imposed downfall. I decided I'd had enough of this crappy state of mind. I marched up stairs decided to throw myself into the last few chapters of my book and take my mind off of things. That's the trick I'm seeing now. Its to change focus, and not give in to those nasty little impulses. I caved only once more opting for a last "heave-ho" and had a chocolate chip cookie. After that, my insulin levels spiked and crashed of course...

So I had a nice salad last night, and a very healthy dinner of steamed veggies, rice (need to change this to brown) and mushroom chicken. When going to bed, I was quite pleased with myself for getting this little binge under control. Also (earlier in the day) I decided to go shopping and change my focus even more to my size. This wasn't as depressing as I'd expected. I bought a size 6 skirt which had me flying high! I was so excited since I've been frequenting the 8-9 sections as of late. Well...no more..Not until I get pregnant at the very least.

This morning I packed my breakfast, lunch and snack and feel pretty confident that it's going to be a better day. Read More!

Weekend Stumbling

Wow, I'm so ashamed of how poorly I've eaten this weekend that I'm almost too embarrassed to blog about it. The downhill spiral started on Friday night, after I got home from the movies. I got some bad news regarding a project that I'd intended on doing for a family member, and I started stress-eating. What started out as a minor dinner stumble, which I could've recovered from ended up being a full scale binge late that night.

Saturday...was even worse. I went to a birthday party for my friends daughter, and we normally drink quite a bit. Between the drinking and snacking I totally blew my eating plan. I'm in the negative with my points right now...But last night we also TTC. (Bd'd) which is really no excuse. My judgment was poor and I really should've tried to stay on track. Today, I definitely need to do something active and really really stay on top of my eating plan. In fact, I think I will plan out my week in advanced in order to steer clear of any mishaps this week.

I never realized how weak I get on the weekends, when I am not working, or have much structure. I really just let down my hair and use every excuse in the book to eat freely and make some really bad choices! Well...That is going to change. I need to be a bit more firm with myself if I want to see results.

It's possible I might be pregnant, which isn't going to deter my efforts. I have about 3 weeks of waiting to find out, so in the meantime I am going to assume that my normal diet will continue. I still eat healthily, just too much. I don't drink often, and I no longer consume caffeine, or sodas. These next three weeks will contain ZERO drinking, and I need to be more conscientious of what sort of aspirin / meds I take. I took midol last night because I felt like a headache was coming on, but moving forward, I need to be more careful, until I'm absolutely positive that I am not pregnant.

This whole "am, or aren't I?" is really tiring. We've been TTC for six months, and its' been really hard on me. After I got off the pill in Dec. I gained 10 lbs and ate like there was no tomorrow, thinking that if I "was" pregnant, I didn't want to deprive the baby. After all these months, of thinking that way, I've packed on another 10 lbs. Hence my need to join WW.

This has been a really good exercise for me though. I'm getting a clearer view of my weaknesses and strengths, and can clearly see where I need to be more disciplined and careful. Clearly stress, and hanging out with friends is dangerous point for me in terms of diet. I just need to get my head in the game and not let outside influences have an effect on my eating habits.

I think moving forward, this week and next weekend will be better for me. I want to do better, and I want to improve myself.

Now, in terms of the type of activity I do, in attempt to rid myself of some guilt from the weekend, I am not sure what I should do. Normally I would go for a really hard run, but when I think of the possibility of being pregnant, I get worried, that I'd shake the darn thing out. Stupid, I know, I just really really want this, and don't want to do anything stupid to prevent it from happening. I think maybe a nice hard bike ride would be good for me. I know it's not as many points on the activity scale, but it's really something I enjoy. Or...maybe I'll go for a hike..Not sure though, cause it's really cloudy out right now, and it doesn't look like it's going to clear up.

I do have TONS of housework to do, so that could be good..At least the house would be cleaner :)

Ok. Enough speculating. I need to get this day moving. I promised the hubby a nice breakfast. Lets get out the point calculator... Read More!

Solution

Ok. Here's the plan. In lieu of my little crack up here after lunch. I am taking corrective action. Tonight, I am going to run for 30-45 min. (before dinner) After that, I am going to make a nice low calorie dinner for myself and family, and then give myself a bath. (I've never taken a bath at our house, I normally just shower) But I need to remember that after doing something active, a reward is called for. Not a reward I can eat, but one I can feel and appreciate. A bubble bath is in order!

I walked the dog already this morning, so that guilt is out of the way. I will walk him again tomorrow morning. But tonight, is just for me. I haven't run in a very long time, so I will do my very best, and smile. - Rain or shine! Read More!

Thoughts on Caving

So today...(only day two) I caved. Although...in my own defense I must say...I did acquire 2 additional points (I get 20 daily) plus a weekly 35 extra. So I am definitely dipping into my 35 points this week. I wish I didn't. My head is pounding and I don't feel so good. It was such a stupid move. I had a twix bar....I don't know why I just did it out of impulse. I've been trying to cut artificial sweetners out of my diet, but I think for impulses like this, it may not be a bad idea to have something low-fat and sweet on hand.

I did really well yesterday, and for most of today. (I resisted the meeting donuts this morning!) So I don't want to brood too heavily on how bad this was. Today hasn't passed without a little success. I just need to be more careful about what I eat tonight and for the rest of the week. I've noticed a 2 lb. drop just in two days alone. I highly doubt that twix will put me in the red, it's just not a very healthy habit. I need to replace it with a different habit. Which one, I'm not sure....The thing is, when these cravings occur, they don't just go away. I forget about them and then come back to them later until I give in. I guess I will just need to further develop my discipline and be more firm with myself. Especially if I am a diabetic risk.

The next meals (moving forward) will be different. Read More!

The Eating Dilemma

So, I've decided to approach my plan of attack from two angles. The first will be to tackle the eating dilemma. The second..The workout dilemma. (although that's a work in progress). I went to the Dr.'s yesterday and in lieu of trying to conceive she told me that I was borderline overweight. So...with some resistance, I decided to sign up for weight watchers. Today is my first day of my 20 pt. allotment. So far so good. I just need to keep my mind on the positive aspects. My health will improve, this will probably better our chances of getting pregnant. And finally, my clothes will fit me better!

I decided to pay the doc a visit since I'm at high risk for diabetes (all of mother's side suffers from it) and because well, when I get preggers, I don't want gestational diabetes either! So, I need to keep my eye on the goal and press ahead. These things for me, are usually 90% head games, 10% effort. So....Here We Go!!! Read More!